Not Dead Yet

Long time, no blog.

I am still alive and well and living in Philadelphia. Michelle and I bought a house in the northwestern reaches of the city and I'm busy with work trying to pay for it and working on it, trying to make it pay for itself.

The kittens are now a year old and have pretty much adjusted to their new home. They are not allowed outside here because our (larger) yard is not fenced in.

There's no baby news yet, thanks for asking.

I went to see Dr. Judy last week - he told me 'the tumor should be back by now - you should be dead.' But I'm not, so that's good. He feels I'm past the critical point - it's not over and never will be, but, statistically at least, I've gotten a lot farther than most. So take a quiet moment to consider those less fortunate. Thank you - now, let's party!

Milestone MRI

A week ago, Monday, July 30, 2007, I had my first post-treatment MRI, which was clear. This means I've made it to 1 ½ years post-surgery without any sign of tumor. I haven't heard anyone mention the term 'remission' and I'm not sure that it's used for brain tumors, but I'm feeling some distance from having a tumor and this is great news for me. Dr. Rosenfeld wants to keep getting MRIs every two months for the first six months after treatment - that means through November 2007, then space them out to three months, and more. The catch is the insurance coverage. So far, so good for me, but she told me sometimes insurance refuses to pay and that ends up setting the schedule.

In other news, I've been working a lot this summer. We've had some short breaks and I was planning on doing a blacksmithing workshop right now, but I had to cancel because... last week was Michelle's big week for IVF and I needed to be around for that. I'll post any big news on the blog, of course, but things are looking good so far.

We're also seriously looking at houses to buy, which is very exciting. We're thinking pretty seriously about the Mount Airy neighborhood here in Philadelphia - larger houses with more space inside and out, quieter, tree-lined streets, and some very nice older architecture among other things make it very appealing. No offers made yet, but probably quite soon.

Michelle's show 'Disarray' for the Philly Fringe is coming up in early September - that means lots of work for her ( and a little for me as her 'technical director' ). September 2nd is also our first marriage anniversary, so we're going to get away for a day or two to celebrate.

Change of pace

This month, because of scheduling issues at the hospital, I end up with an extra week before I see the neurologist again. I think my body's a little confused by this since I felt like it (the body part of me) was getting all geared up for another massive dose of toxins by getting anxious about every little thing. This week's anxiety-driver: my manager suggested I find a thank-you gift for an associate who has been acting as an informal consultant on my recent assignment of designing and installing a software build-and-deploy system for our team. Go figure.

I think the anxiety crested on Saturday night when I was having trouble sleeping and then had a long, elaborate nightmare in which Michelle and I plotted and carried out someone's murder. I won't bore you with the ramblings of my subconscious, but I ended up doing the deed, being arrested, and humiliated. It was an awful feeling and after a little reflection saw that in my mind, I am the killer and the victim here. I am not sure what else to make of it but it was the most powerful dream I've had in a long time.

Winter has started to move in here in southeastern Pennsylvania and with the cold comes colds and flus and the like. I've been lucky so far, even with my suppressed immune system, but Michelle has been out for a few days. It seemed like she was on her way out of a cold today when it turned flu-ish, so I'm watching over her this evening.

I'm considering requesting a 'chemo vacation' or hiatus, at least, for a few months while I try to learn more about the leukemia risk associated with Temodar. I think my body could really use the break, especially during the winter and I'd like a clearer head in making my decisions about this.